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This moment.

They were waiting patiently for Josh to finish the lights. Breanna just spontaneously wrapped her arms around her brothers (maybe to hug or maybe to strangle). I LOVE how all their arms are touching:)

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other. ~Burton Hillis

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Decorating Our Tree.....

I LOVE

• how you all loved taking out your Santa hats and wearing them
• That Bre was so into it the whole time (it's usually hit or miss with her) especially pointing to the exact spot that her ornaments needed to hang
• That Lucas loved taking out all his own ornaments
• How Bre put her Santa hat on the dog---priceless!
• The glow of their little faces around the tree
• the lights
• The handmade ornaments and garland
• That we took our time and enjoyed the moment

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And Finding Our Christmas Tree.....The story.

We headed on on the cold, but nice day to our favorite Beech Ridge Farm. We've been picking out our Christmas tree here since we moved to this town even before the kids (except for one year-I was pregnant with Lucas and we put up a fake tree---it just wasn't the same). Well, the tree crop seems to be getting thinner and thinner every year, so we walked around for what seemed like miles (and literally hours) across the whole field of trees looking for that "perfect one" "How about this one?" Trevor would say....."no I think I see a better one over there" and "Oh, it's to thin, too short, or it has a bald spot". I would have been happy with the first one we saw, but I was willing to take a "nice walk" The kids did great with all that walking, and then finally after the 50th tree that we thought was "the one", Lucas said," Just cut it already!" so we did, and we brought it home. It was short, but perfectly symmetrical and honestly we could have brought any tree home and it would have looked nice with all of our decorations. I hope these memories and traditions are something that the kids always take with them. I heart Christmas.

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Today, we headed over to the used ski sale. This sport is expensive, even for used stuff. We managed to find a few good deals, Trevor came home with everything, I came home with some boots, and Lucas came home with a helmet. And Bre, I'm not even close to ready to think about her on skis yet (although they do have a special program here.) Kids getting exercise, it's money well spent.

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Stringing up the lights......

got some lights at Lowe's and brought them home

got them up and realized that we didn't have enough

back to Lowe's for more lights, they ran out of the one's we needed

Back to a different Lowe's after the kids went to bed

brought them home and put some up, didn't really like them.

The next day, brought them back to Lowe's and got some new ones (cheaper). Stay tuned for the grand unveiling later this week!

AND, a moment. Trevor and Lucas were outside for a moment watching Josh string up our first set of lights. At that very moment, we got a three second snow shower. You would think that these kids had never seen snow before, they threw on their jackets and shouted, "it's snowing!" They ran up and down the driveway trying to catch a snowflake on their tongues. The simple pleasures of childhood.

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Giving Thanks 2010.

Good times. It didn't matter that I had to work until 2. We rotisserized and smoked a 19 lb turkey in 3 1/2 hours, it was PERFECT! Lucas kept yelling "It's Thanksgiving, did you know it's Thanksgiving today!" , he also asked what the hole in the turkey was for. We cooked everything from scratch and surprisingly it all came together quite easily. The smell of the turkey and onions and celery cooking. We used cloth napkins (on our laps) and a cloth table cloth. We held hands and went around the table saying what we were thankful for...Lucas was thankful for "leaves". If you were 8 or older, you got to use the "good" china. Breanna had 4 helpings of Turkey and Lucas and Trevor shared the leg. The Patriots won. We had chocolate pie and cheesecake for dessert, heaven! We added another entry to our gratitude box. Most everyone was Thankful for home. Breanna wrote all over herself and the dog with marker (washable). The kids all climbed into the chair after dinner, cuddled, tickled, laughed and watched football. Precious memories. I am thankful for my family and all the people in my life. They have impacted me in ways I have yet to even realize. We are all faced with struggles, stress & sadness in our lives, but I am thankful for this season, for the comforts of home and the people I love. Wishing you Peace today and always.....and save the neck for me....Clark!

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Thanksgiving Eve:

a boxing match

making pies

Listening to Christmas music

making plans for the upcoming season

a walk in the woods on a blustery day

re-inventing the playroom

hot chocolate

Charlie Brown Christmas

making cranberry sauce

and this year, so much to be thankful for. Kids who use the bathroom by themselves (and wash hands), kids who go to bed early and sleep all night, kids who no longer need booster seats or high chairs, kids who eat everything that we eat for dinner (finally!). It has been a long road to get here, some days I cried, some days I laughed, some days my heart was light and joyful, some days it was heavy, some days I prayed. I'm just thankful that I get to be here for all of it.

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AND....we turned up the music and danced.

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this game is Trevor's new love. He goes around the house asking anyone if they will play with him. I got beat a few times and won a few. BUT, it's usually Lucas that ends up playing. It's fun.

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A bathroom makeover .......and what we learned:

1) replacing a toilet takes 5 minutes, replacing a faucet takes 5 hours

2) the "studs" are never where you need them to be

3) a little paint changes everything

4) just get the matching furniture instead of trying to hunt all over for something just a little cheaper

5) when someone is under a sink, don't ask how you can help.

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It's basketball time!

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This boy.....

helps me put away the groceries every week now (he unpacks the bags by himself and I put away).

Loves to pretend he's grocery shopping at home and fills his cart with all kinds of "stuff" from around the house and then says, "how am I going to pay for all this?"

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Right Now.....

We dug out the old tape player so Trevor and I could listen to this book on tape every night while doing our "special time".

thinking about the holidays, decorating and finishing up my shopping

Looking forward to Turkey Trot race this afternoon at Trevor's school

still getting outside to run and ride bikes as the temperatures become more blustery and cold

looking forward to the weekend, Trevor's basketball game and starting our bathroom remodel.

needing to remind myself not to feel emotional about how Breanna didn't even seem like a part of her classroom today (when I was there). They had two substitutes.

Hanging out with a three year old all day, playing and making things and watching him grow and learn new things each day....it's amazing.

folding laundry

remembering an amazing human being. It's funny how loss in life makes us rethink EVERYTHING. It makes us notice every breath we take and feel grateful for every single ordinary moment. Life is precious.

Good News.

Barb came through her surgery with flying colors and might be home tomorrow! We love you Barb, You are an inspiration:)

Sad News.

Today, we lost (and the world lost) a mentor and friend. Eckart Horn (our young Church pastor) collapsed suddenly this morning passed away. Please pray for his family, wife and four young children. We are attending the prayer service tonight. It's wierd, last night I went to Karen's blog and I was Listening to tired of Wasting time . And Eckart's last Sermon this past Sunday (below) it's almost as if God's words were on his lips speaking to his own family. Life is not fair. These upcoming holidays just won't be the same......

It’s this time of the year again ..a difficult time for some and for others a good time ….one more Sunday ..Christ the King Sunday ..Thanks Giving and then the church year is over. In 2 weeks all starts again with Advent and a new Birth at Christmas.

Transition is the theme and the joys and difficulties of it ..the hopes and the despair ..both, side by side like the 2 lessons we heard from Isaiah and Luke. They talk about how bad things can become and about how well/good all matter of things will be. They talk about despair and hope, death and resurrection, Good Friday and Easter Morning. They talk about birthing pains ..transitions and change, they talk about humans and God.

How does one feel when you see your whole world falling apart in and around you? How do those Haitian people feel now ..who lost everything? How do you live with famine ..deadly floods and war?

But we do not need to go to other countries …..How do we live with the death of a child? How do we live with divorce ..addiction and lonliness ..a terminal illness.

I think we all in our lifes sooner or later come across something we call despair. Maybe not as grand in the headlines as in earthquakes ..tsunamies ..wars and the likes ..more quieter ..like a more privat loss of some kind /may it have been a patient ..or a beloved career, a partner ..a loved one. It can also be the loss of Hope or Joy, meanng and purpose ..and suddenly we find ourselves after much struggle – loud or quietly - eye to eye with despair ..eye to eye with not knowing what to do. For many Christmas and ThanksGiving can be such a time where we come eye to eye with our lonliness, grief and tears; inescapable it comes every year.

And around and into those moments of despair is what those 2 lessons are trying to speak to. The Gospel in no uncertain terms tells us that life can be bad / very bad ..and if we think its bad ..it can come worse. Life is not like a sight seeing trip .. like the deciples admire what they see .. it can be bad ..desolete ..lonly and full of pain and injustice! But this is just one side ..though a side that must be seen, faced, acknowledge ..like good Friday ..before the other side ..the end of the story ..Easter …can unfold. And that Easter we hear in the lesson of Isaiah.

Isaiah 65:17-25

For I am about to create new heavens

and a new earth;

the former things shall not be remembered

or come to mind.

But be glad and rejoice forever

in what I am creating;

for I am about to create Jerusalem as a joy,

and its people as a delight.

I will rejoice in Jerusalem,

and delight in my people;

no more shall the sound of weeping be heard in it,

or the cry of distress.

No more shall there be in it

an infant that lives but a few days,

or an old person who does not live out a lifetime;

for one who dies at a hundred years will be considered a youth,

and one who falls short of a hundred will be considered accursed.

They shall build houses and inhabit them;

they shall plant vineyards and eat their fruit.

They shall not build and another inhabit;

they shall not plant and another eat;

for like the days of a tree shall the days of my people be,

and my chosen shall long enjoy the work of their hands.

They shall not labor in vain,

or bear children for calamity;

for they shall be offspring blessed by the LORD--

and their descendants as well.

Before they call I will answer,

while they are yet speaking I will hear.

The wolf and the lamb shall feed together,

the lion shall eat straw like the ox;

but the serpent-- its food shall be dust!

They shall not hurt or destroy

on all my holy mountain, says the LORD.

There will be justice …there will be peace ….there will be joy and Love!

No story ends with despair ..despair is not the last thing, it might feel like it ..it might taste like it and it might look like it. Jesus felt it and we feel it! And in the same way Jesus surrendered to the will of God we can do that too …we can surrender all those feelings and emotions to God. And when we do that ..when we really let go of all that brought or pushed us to that place of despair a sudden transition takes place ..it comes quietly ..bits and pieces of silence ..and peace ..like first light after a very dark night.

If we don’t let God into those places ..things will not change ….so in regards to the upcoming Christmas/Holiday season …. Let God into your lonliness ..into all the pain and memories ..let God walk you through it ……step by step ..and you will feel bits and pieces of silence and peace and once God walked you through, the despair will be gone!, peace will have steped into its place.

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982.

Being a Mom Means experiencing moments of Great beauty, amazing tenderness, sticky kisses and a miracle or two all in a single day.

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We're doing THIS project this year (along with our gratitude box that we started a few years ago.)

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He's into......

Orgami Yoda "the popular" book (he made about 100 of them) by looking the how to video up on You Tube

Long Hair (god help me)

The Lightning Thief Series of books.

Harry Potter the movies.

and a story...... Trevor, when you went to give me a hug the other night before you were getting ready for bed it was the best thing ever (I don't get a lot of hugs from my big boy anymore). Anyway, it was a super LONG hug and I wasn't letting go. As I squeezed tight, I could feel, there just wasn't an ounce of baby in you left, you are so big. Promise me, that you'll never stop hugging your Mom.....

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Spending a lot of time in Lowe's today after church. Scoping out some Christmas gear (new LED lights) and supplies and paint for our downstairs bathroom remodel next weekend-Exciting!

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Today.

The third annual Maine Down Syndrome Network conference.

This year our teachers were there (Breanna's K teacher, special Ed teacher, OT and Gym teacher!). Inspiring as always. Susan Shapiro's workshop on Friendships was amazing, I could have listened to her all day. We have a LONG way to go.