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Today:

Feeling good that I've gotten alot of time with the kids during the past few weeks but terrrible that I haven't gotten a workout in.

Feeling good about working a lot of Day shifts to be home after school for family dinner and tucking into bed, but horrible getting up at 5 am and burning the candle at both ends.

Feeling scared about this whole swine flu outbreak hitting close to home.  Just waiting and knowing that anything bad could happen at anytime just kills me!

Feeling bad that I can't make it to a really improtant event that I was recently invited to, I always try to make it to the really important stuff.

Feeling really excited about our Disney trip next November, we booked our place!

Feeling excited for Trevor's baseball season-1st practice tommorrow!

Looking forward to the first grade Spring Concert next Tuesday.

Today's challenge

go here.

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cutie boy! You are growing too fast.....

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• cool then warm unpredictable breezes moving form the sea to the land and then vise versa
  
• the smell of the fresh air
  
• a surprise afternoon at the shore and a picnic dinner, moving between beaches on either side of the cove
• ending up on the large side and deciding to stay just a little longer for the endless play that the sea has to offer
• the most amazing story of the day was how Bre was right in the middle playing with a group of Trevor's friends--throwing rocks in the water and making sandcastles.  GO BRE!
• no words can describe the feeling of a real beach day in Maine in April.  

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My favorite summer beverage:  Fresh  Lemonade with citrus slices 

completely refreshing

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First day at the beach this year (in true Mainer style--it was COLD!)

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Around the fire......

Getting warm.

Past Breanna's bedtime :(

Watching the first star come out and making a wish..

Naming our top 5 favorite  and least favorite candies of all time.

Josh favorite: Snickers, Peanut butter cups, gummie bears, Swedish fish, Junior mints

Me favorite: Peanut butter cups, Reces Pieces easter eggs, Gummy bears, Hershey bars, Lindt truffles

Trevor favorite: Twizzlers, Peanut butter cups, Smarties, Gummy Bears, Marshmallows

Lucas  favorite: "chocolate!"

The WORST: Circus peanuts, Candy corn, Marshmallow peeps, Cadbury cream eggs, snow caps

Looking forward to many more fun conversations around the fire this summer.

we all scream for....

We are just so happy Summer is coming early this year.  Tonight the first Dairy Corner ice cream of the year and we enjoyed every lick:)

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morning moments.

(and Thank God for cameras, because these moments are gone in an instant.)

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The beginning of a littel 4 day Family spring Vacation, getting the garage cleaned out, and getting the bikes out.  Right now every second of the day Lucas asks, "go outside, ride bikes!"  and he has several to choose from (but likes the pink the best:))  

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YOU.....without the spoken word you sense things about people, animals and the world.  You have a very special spirit, energy and love within you.  

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Dreaming of summer.....of days at the beach, warm weather and fresh fruits and vegetables.  I hope it is right around the corner (maybe this weekend!!)

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introducing the newest memeber of our large dog family--  "Uncle" Ike.  Trevor's spending a few days with him this week (without Mom and Dad!).  Puppies and little kids just go well together.  

Pictures from the weekend.

Four.

Happy Birthday Lily!  We you had a great day!   We Love you and miss you pretty  girl.

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favorite days spent with friends.....

• the fact that five kids under the age of 7 could play peacefully with minimal adult intervention all weekend.
• The chainsaw story (I laughed so hard I cried...)
• hiking in the woods (and seeing some scary snakes, turtles and salamanders) and loving that we all like to do the same things
• The weather!
• The volcano eruption
• The first s'mores of the year.
• The bouncie house (you could not rip Breanna away from that thing!)
• totally sucking at the 80's edition of trivial persuit(were't we still watching Sesame Street in the 80's?)
• lava cakes
• laughing and talking like we had just seen each other yesterday
• good food, good drink and good times...Thank you guys!
  
  

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riding a two wheeler for the very first time all by yourself ---you just picked it up and did it!  (I'm sure that the fact that it was a Strawberry Shortcacke bike will come back to haunt you someday--but we're so proud of you!)

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We're off.

After a VERY stressful night at work last night spent thinking and rethinking about a lot of things which led to a very restless night's sleep last night, a bunch of cranky crying kids this morning while trying to get ready and pack for this weekend and a husband who decided it was necessary to run out to Target this morning b/c he had "no clothes" , I'm beginning to rethink the whole Disney World trip thing.  Anyway, we're off for a fun (hopefully) weekend visiting friends in Southern New England.  Here's to warm temperatures, relaxing and Barbequeing with great friends!  See you back here Sunday night with photos!  Have a great weekend!

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Love this.

A friend of mine and I were talking at work the other night. The difference in ages between her oldest and youngest is 10 years. She said, " the best part about the kids and their age difference is the gift the younger one has been to the older one. It is like the older child gets to feel the love that a parent has for a child when they are still so young" Pretty cool.

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Gosh you are growing up fast.

You have an iPod (I don't)

You have two big teeth!

Your smile and your laugh are contageous.

You are so handsome.

Love you, my boy.

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P.S. Head over here to see pics from Jeff's big homecoming.  Not a dry eye in the house I tell you.....

When it comes to special needs children

Sometimes it's so hard to find people that really "get it."  I'm not blaming the rest of the world for not understanding, all I'm saying is that when I find someone out there who really gets it, I just want to hang on to that person.  Sometimes you don't even get it yourself until talking with others in the same situation.  This was said to me today.  I haven't heard words this true in a long time.

It's just different and people don't get it.  You're running around and doing all these things for your special needs child, taking them to endless appointments, researching and calling and finding new therapies, seeing doctors, meeting with teachers.   You sort of  become more of a manager of that child.  It doesn't leave much room for forming a relationship with them.  Sometimes they just need to be the child and you need to be the parent.  

AND, on a really positive note, I met Breanna's new Speech therapist today....in the 10 mins I Talked with her I already know I'm going to love her:)  Breanna now oficially has the most amazing group of people working with her, people who would give their right arm to help this little girl.  It has taken a while to get here, but it was worth it!

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the funny things you do right now.

I love how you put your finger up and say, "Lucas have idea"

I also how you love to play, "throw chase", golf, and you  love to mop the floor

I love how you can count to twenty with help.  

You are a cutie!

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Welcome home soldier!

We missed you so much and can't wait to catch up....Talk to you soon!

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Happy Easter!

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Thank you Grandma and Grandpa for our new Easter shirts!

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just drawin'.....

Tiny dancers...big hearts NBC nightly news

Watch here...and here .....and here......

I can't wait until Breanna can be a part of something like this!

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winter's end.....the VERY last little patch of snow in our yard.

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On Parenting.

Whenever one of our kids has an "issue" Josh and I usually get together after they go to bed and talk about what to do.  Usually the resolve is figuring out how we can do better as parents.  Usually, what the problem child needs is more love/attention/one-on-one time OR more limits.  With her, We are trying the first, first--she deserves at least 1/3 of the attention right?  Josh and I concluded that we weren't living in reality just thinking that someday Breanna will just wake up talking, it's going to take ALOT of hard work.  TIme for us to work harder and be better parents.  Time for more routine in our life.  This morning Josh got up with her and involved her 1:1 in all the morning chores---making breakfast, feeding the dog, etc....  hopefully her cup was full with that today and things will get better.  I'm so glad that we can see parenting as a team approach and that one of us doesn't always have all the answers.  I'm so glad we can let some things go to be mindful of what they need.  And that, well,  it fills my cup:)

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A two year old's day out.

drop off sister at preschool

grocery store

kids' second hand clothing store

Doctor's appointment (25.2 lbs, 33 1/4 inches tall-1 shot) where he just HAD to press the elevator buttons

Lunch (egg and cheese bagel sandwich from Dunkin Donuts)

Toys R Us for gifts (fell asleep in the cart)

Staples for more printer ink (asleep on Mom's shoulder)

Snipitz for more girl hair stuff.

Pick up sister from preschool

home.

snacks, outside, playing with toys (dumping, throwing, fighting with sister etc...) "helping" with dinner, pick out "cozies", read books...bed.  (phew!)

Lessons from children.

Breanna is sick again today. WE had a REALLY difficult weekend with her. To the doctor today and she's on a albuterol nebulizer and an antibiotic now . Hopefully she gets back to herself soon. So Scary to think about what has happened to some other children I know with DS who have gotten pneumonia. Their little lungs (with the low muscle tone) just couldn't handle it. Inspiration for today here. Looking forward to summer.....

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The fist time I ever really danced (and it was just about the cutest thing that I have ever seen!)

and look who slept through the night last night for the very first time (I'll dance to that!)

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Egg coloring day.....

(and TRevor was BEGGING to do this from the moment he woke up this morning!)

Egg coloring Day

Enjoy!

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Just our usual pre-bedtime wrestling time.....

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I'm grateful to be starting our morning together, no matter where the day might take us. AND today, we're celebrating Lucas sleeping through the night for the very first time!!!

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B. D. Gulledge : I used to sit on the banks with a raft and watch the water roll lazily by. One day I pushed my raft into the shallows of the water and found the water moved swifter than I thought. My raft was actually a boat. Then, after some time, I rowed my little boat into deeper water. There were great storms, mighty winds, tremendous waves, and sometimes I felt so alone. But I have noticed my little rowboat is now a mighty ship manned by my friends and loved ones; and beautiful calm seas, warm sunny days, and nights filled with comfortable dreams always double after a storm. Now, I could never go back and sit on the bank. In fact, I search for deeper water. Such is life when lived.

Ali's post yesterday about Autism really made me pause and reflect on OUR journey and where we have been and how we have changed. I can't believe how different my life is from what I expected it to be. Even though it still resurfaces at times, we can celebrate the fact that we have conquered the grief of not having the child that we expected. And we CAN have high expectations, but also keeping in mind what is REALLY possible. The great thing is though, the people we have come into contact through our journey. People we would have never normally met. We share the vulnerability we each inherited when our particular child was born to us. The automatic humbling that came to us, every one and out of it was created a kinship unlike any other but that pain can bring. The final proof of our humanity is in the non-comparing love we can show for our children and for each other. (**excerpt from DS News 2009#2). We are there to help each other out of that deep water.

What I really can't wait for is the day, Breanna, that you are fully talking. I can't wait to see how your mind works and all the thoughts that occupy your time. I can't wait to hear your questions and I can't wait to explain things to you and see your mind working to digest them. I can't wait to tell you about why the sky is blue and the grass is Green, I can't wait to hear your thoughts about the world and the things you love to watch. I can't wait to get to a place where your speech skills catch up with your obvious need to communicate. Until then, I can only be grateful for how far we have come to get to today, and how you have taught me patience. Good things come to those who can wait.

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Dear Lucas,

Tonight you are asleep in your crib by yourself for the very first time. The crying was heartbreaking, but please know that we still love you with all our hearts....so much so that we need to give you this greatest gift. The gift of sleeping through the night and waking up rested, well and ready to play!

Love,

Mommy